Guiding Parents of LGBTQ Youth to a Loving Relationship

Guiding Parents of LGBTQ Youth to a Loving, Accepting Relationship

Parenting Coach Susan Berland is fiercely committed to guiding parents of LGBTQ youth back to a loving, accepting relationship when they are struggling to accept their child as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender or queer. Susan guides parents and their kids to communicate effectively, trust one another and accept one another where and as they are.

Susan gave us a brief explanation for each of the letters in LGBTQ and sad some refer to it as alphabet soup!   She also shared the difference between sexual orientation and gender identity.

Some of the topics we discussed:

LGBTQ YouthMy child is gay or lesbian

1. What age do kids usually come out as gay or lesbian?
2. How do they know they are gay or lesbian?
3. What are some of the common reactions a parent has when their child comes out?
4. Is it my fault?
5. What are their primary fears and concerns?
6. How can a parent keep their gay or lesbian child safe?

LGBTQ YouthMy child is bisexual

1. What does it mean to be bisexual?
2. How is it different from being gay or lesbian?
3. Does one who is bisexual always have to have a partner of both genders?
4. If they’re bisexual, why can’t they just choose to be with an opposite sex partner?
5. What does this mean for their life?

LGBTQ YouthMy child is transgender?

1. How is being transgender different from being gay?
2. At what age does a person come out or realize they are transgender?
3. How is it different for the parent of a transgender child than a parent of a gay child?
4. How can I adjust? How do I get used to a new name, new pronouns?
5. Is it my fault?
6. What are the implications of changing genders (name change, change in birth certificate, changing documents, medical procedures, discrimination)
7. Why is the attempted suicide rate so high among transgender kids?

LGBTQ YouthMy child is queer or gender queer?

1. What is the difference between queer, gender queer and transgender?
2. Why use the word queer? Isn’t that considered a slur?
3. What’s with using they and them as pronouns? Those are plural and we’re talking about one person. It’s not correct grammar.
4. How can I accept something so hard to understand?
5. What will I tell my family, friends, community?

You can learn more about Susan at

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Caren Glasser

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